Archive for December, 2005

People suck


Yeah, I said it. People fuckin suck. Why is it that whenever people need something, I’m usually the first to respond ? And get made to feel like the asshole when I can’t help. But it’s funny that whenever I need something, these bitches are nowhere to be found ? Their phones never get answered, they never come to the door when you ring the bell…it’s like they were abducted by aliens like in The 4400. Then they’re gonna come back, like “what’s up ?”…like I haven’t been leaving voicemails or emails for the past 3 days. “Fuck yo couch, nigga…that’s what’s up”. That’s my New Years resolution. Get new friends. See, most people got it all wrong. Forget losing weight, forget trying to stop smoking, forget about trying to change yourself for other people. Just change people. Get a new team. That’s my plan.

“If you can’t respect that your whole perspective is wack
Maybe you’ll love me when I fade to black”

-Shawn Carter

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What’s your "Prison Bitch" name ?

Mine is “Nut Buster”…I think it fits.

Click Here For Your Prison Bitch Name


Thought of the day

You achieve total enlightenment when you realize that everything in your life is an illusion.


To the 5 or 6 of you

…that take the time to read my ramblings, Merry Christmas muhfuckas !

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I wonder if this causes problems at home ?

I’m listening to the radio today, and I relaize that Slim Thug is on Beyonce’s new single. Not really thing out of place there until you think about the fact that his woman has been beefing with Beyonce and Kelly since they kicked her and the other one out of Destiny’s Child a couple years back. Things that make you say “Hmmmmm ?”. He’s not getting any ass for a while.


Viva Las Vegas, bitches


Recently, I’ve been joking with a lot of my friends about starting up a “Move Miguel to Las Vegas” fund. But during an IM session the other day, the moment of clarity came. I should really do it. I don’t even know how many people have said to me “Now I’ll have a place to stay when I go back !”. Even though I say otherwise, it’s not like I’d turn anyone down, but, I need to find a way to take advantage of the situation. This is what I came up with:

As one who donates* to the fund, on your first trip to visit, you are entitled to 3 days, 2 nights of accomodation. Food, beverage, lodging, enteratainment and transportation included. All subsequent trips will consist of a similar deal, except the visitor will pay for food and beverage, including mine.

That’s a helluva deal. Come to Vegas, and all you gotta do is feed me and buy a nigga a few drinks ? Who wouldn’t go for that ? So, to get down with this plan, hit up me up for info. Cash, check, money order and paypal accepted.

*Actual length of first visit depends on donation amount. May be shorter or longer than 3 days, 2 nights. It is negotiable.


Simple things make me laugh


Reality show idea

Forget “Dancing With The Stars”, I wanna see a dance-off between:

Sean Paul

Amerie

Michelle from Destiny’s Child

Diddy

That shit would be hilarious. I’d watch that show every damn week, and TiVo it as well. It would be possibly the best unintentional comedy on tv since MC Hammer & Emmanuel Lewis had bunk beds on Surreal Life. I need to make some calls…


What’s bothering me today…

I want some juice…but there isn’t any here 😦

When people pull turn in front of you and drive really slow…you saw me coming down the street at 45mph(in a 35 zone) before you made that right hand turn in to my lane. Why are you doing 10mph ? Speed up bitch !

I just found out that my ex is now living in Cabo San Lucas. If anyone should be posted up in Cabo, it’s me. Not her.

It’s cold in here, so I’m about to go turn the heat on.

The Lakers are playing tonight, I bet they’re gonna lose.

My knee hurts.

If I hear that damn “Laffy Taffy” song one more time, I’m gonna kick somebody

I’ll add on as things pop up…


Friday funny

Click to enlarge